Hmmmmm...06-17-13

“An expectation is a premeditated resentment.” –Author Unknown

You’ve planned the perfect summer vacation.  In your mind, the seaside cottage you’ve rented looks exactly like the picture online.  You imagine your family joyfully frolicking about on the beach under the bright summer sun. No petty arguments.  No black and shriveled barbecue food.  No plugged up toilets.  No stitches needed after stepping on a shell.  And absolutely no rainy days or rip tides.

You’re on your way home after a busy day at work, but your kids were home all day.  In your perfect world, the laundry is done, the dishwasher is loaded, and the counters are clean.  Guess again.

You’ve met the One.  You’re sure that this is destiny.  They excitedly tell you that they’ll call.  The phone never rings.

When we expect people to behave the way we want them to, we are setting ourselves up to be offended.  If their actions don’t fit into our preconceived plan, we take it as personal affront.  But being hurt, perturbed, and annoyed is no way to live.

If we change our expectations to accept-ations, we release the need to judge a person or an event.  It becomes easier to adapt to a change in our well-laid plans.  We accept whatever comes.  We accept whatever goes.  And we give ourselves the great gift of peace of mind.

Don’t swim against the tide in the sea of change. Allow for an occasional storm and ride the waves of your life.

Surf’s up!

Gina J

Hmmmmm...06-03-13

“Most people spend their lives reading the menu instead of enjoying the banquet.” –As read on a fortune cookie

What feeds your soul? Do you have reservations about placing an order?

Maybe you’ve had a lifelong passion for music, but never found the time to take lessons.  If the piano is calling your name, don’t tune it out.  There will always be other things to do—laundry, yard work, chauffeuring the kids around.  Add yourself to your To Do list.  Find time to play.

Maybe you’ve looked longingly at the White Mountains and considered joining the AMC Four Thousand Footer Club, but your time is filled with moving mountains for everyone else.  Don’t put yourself at the bottom of the priority pile.  Tell any guilt you have about enjoying yourself to go take a hike.

Maybe you’ve always wanted to see the west coast, to learn to play golf, to write a book, or take ballroom dance classes.  There’s something for everyone at the banquet table of life.  See what’s cooking.

Eat, drink, and be merry!

Gina J

Hmmmmm...05-28-13

Hmmmmm…05-28-13

“When you can’t give no more, they want it all but you gotta say no.

I’m turning off the noise that makes me crazy. 

Lookin’ back with no regrets,

To forgive is to forget.  I want a little piece of mind to turn to.” –As written by

Jonathan Cain, Steve Perry, and Neal Schon of Journey

Oh, oh, be good to yourself!  Singing it is the easy part.  Doing it is another story altogether.

You intuitively know what’s good for you, though you may push those feelings aside and deny that they exist.  Maybe you feel too guilty or selfish if you put yourself first.  Perhaps you even feel nobler somehow when you neglect your own needs.  But somewhere at the center of your soul, you know what makes you happy.  Now how many people and things have you made a priority over your own physical, mental, and spiritual health?

What is more important than your well-being?  To become a well being, you must begin by treating your lifelong companion with the utmost respect.  No one is going to stand in line to floss your teeth for you or to make sure you eat your vegetables.  Nobody is patiently waiting to drive you to the gym after work, and then put you on the treadmill.  There isn’t a cheering squad waiting to applaud you when you walk in the door at the end of a long day.

Choose how you fuel your body and your mind.  Love yourself when nobody else will.  Oh, oh be good to yourself!

Turn it up,

Gina :-)

Hmmmmm...05-20-13

Hmmmmm…05-20-13

“In a world full of people who couldn’t care less, be someone who couldn’t care more.” –Author Unknown

It’s always something.  Whether people are complaining about taxes, politics, the economy, global warming, or even the younger generation, our famous last words usually are, “I wish they’d do something about this.”

But who exactly are they?  We make it sound like there’s a big think tank where the masterminds of the world are meeting to solve all of our problems, when the only problem we really have is not realizing that they are us.

So if you’re mad as hell and you’re not going to take it anymore—great!  Instead of being an expert complainer, begin right where you are to effect change by applying the catch phrase, “Think globally.  Act locally.”  What can you do on your own street, in your own neighborhood, in your own town to make a difference?  Mother Teresa, Nelson Mandela, Gandhi—all people just like you.  They all started somewhere.

Lessons from the Lorax: “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better.  It’s not.”  He was the lone voice of reason in Thneed-ville.  Be the voice in Your-ville. 

Have a care in the world,

Gina J

Hmmmmm...05-13-13

Hmmmmm…05/13/13

"There's one sad truth in life I've found while journeying east and west. The only folks we really wound are those we love the best. We flatter those we scarcely know. We please the fleeting guest. And deal full many a thoughtless blow to those who love us best." -Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Have you hugged your child (spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, grandmother, grandfather, mother, father, sister, or brother) today? 

As famous song lyrics remind us, “You always hurt the one you love, the one you shouldn’t hurt at all.”  And yet, we tend to give ourselves a Get Out of Jail Free card when we mistreat those closest to us.  We justify our behavior by telling ourselves that since our loved ones know us the best, they should understand.  They should forgive.  They should know we love them. 

While a certain amount of venting is healthy, be cautious about becoming the family fault-finder.  If you’ve become the armchair critic at home, it’s time to relinquish your La-Z-Boy. Ask yourself if you would ever treat your co-workers the same way you sometimes treat your spouse.  Are you as patient with your own child as you are with someone else’s?

Instead of folding your arms in disdain, how about opening them in a gesture of love?  There are physical benefits to hugging.  It reduces stress and improves the immune system of the hugger and the huggee!  The average person needs four hugs a day to reap these rewards.  Why not start with your own family?

Charity begins at home,

Gina J

Hmmmmm...05-06-13

Hmmmmm…05/06/13

“If you cannot find the truth right where you are, where else do you expect to find it?” –Ralph Waldo Emerson

Attention Truth Seekers!  Let’s take a Transformational Moral Inventory—a TMI—right here, right now. 

You don’t need a shovel to dig up your truth.  And you don’t need a map to find it.  The only place you have to go is in, as indicated by the word ‘inventory’.  If other people outside of you were responsible for your thoughts and behavior, it would be called an ‘outventory’. 

Begin by asking yourself if you are harboring any ill will.  Are you hanging on to grudges, hates, jealousies, or resentments?  It can be oh-so-easy to justify your own unacceptable behavior.  Perhaps you’ve rationalized your feelings by reassuring yourself that you were provoked, that you had no choice.  Or you’ve tried to dismiss your actions, pretending that your wrongs don’t count, that everyone else does the same thing.

A TMI can reveal TMI—Too Much Information—that we would prefer not to uncover.  When we take cover and deny our weaknesses, we avoid our own truth. And then we can’t recover.

Discover who you are by going on a fact-finding mission.  Appreciate your strengths.Acknowledge your imperfections.  Transform who you are becoming.

Mission: Possible!

Gina J

Hmmmmm...04-15-13

“I don’t have pet peeves like some people.  I have whole kennels of irritation.”

–Whoopi Goldberg

If you’re dog-tired of everyone yanking your chain, read on. Maybe you need to learn to keep your temper on a shorter leash.

Picture this: you are behind a slow driver who keeps tapping the breaks and checking road signs.  Do you immediately begin to tailgate, intending for this unknown driver to sense your rage as you bear down on them at a menacingly close range?  Do you curse about their inability to drive?  Do you then lay on the horn? 

Stop grinding your teeth and unclench your fists.  When you’re constantly aggravated by little annoyances, your body produces too much adrenaline.  Over time, this leads to a weakened heart and stiffening arteries, and can triple your risk of heart attack.  Scientists believe that chronic anger is more dangerous than smoking and obesity as a factor that will contribute to an early death.

There’s nothing warm and fuzzy about pet peeves that can kill you.  Next time you’re following an irritatingly slow driver, take a deep breath and count to ten.  Since our neurological response to anger only lasts about two seconds, the extra eight seconds should help!  Now consider this: maybe this driver is new in town.  Perhaps they’re lost. But one thing is for sure—your anger is not shortening the other guy’s life. 

Call off the dogs before the fur flies.  Learn to tame the savage beast.

Don’t let ‘em rattle your cage,

Gina J